Growing Up as Grown-Ups: Cultivating Leaders to Navigate Complexity
At this point, planetary problems can feel too staggering to confront. The climate clock seems to be ticking towards an apocalyptic future, wars rage in Ukraine and Gaza, social media lures soporific users into seductive reel-tunnels. Yet, if you’re a leader of an organization, or a coach, or simply someone who would like to help yourself and others, you can’t sink into nihilistic inaction. The only way to deal with an increasingly complex and mystifying world, as Jennifer Garvey Berger puts it in Changing on the Job, is by developing yourself. Hers is a book that centers on “adult development” at a time when many global leaders might seem infantile and unready for roles they have been appointed to. Nonetheless, when we can’t impact the big, we would do well to focus on our own spheres of control.
Berger herself stumbled into adult development during her doctoral program at Harvard, when she encountered In Over Our Heads: The Mental Demands of Modern Life by Robert Kegan. In his work, Kegan had observed that modernity imposes a degree of complexity that might exceed our limited capabilities. He suggested moving through “orders of consciousness” to grapple with ongoing paradoxes and predicaments. Early in her doctoral program while also “newly pregnant” Berger extended this thinking into organizational contexts. Fifteen years ago, she published the first edition of Changing on the Job, and now, in her 2nd revised edition, she has incorporated more diverse perspectives, including the viewpoints of other cultures and nationalities. The publication couldn’t have been timed better: “This capacity to turn difficulty into development is what our world is crying out for right now.”
To begin with, Jennifer acknowledges that human interactions are difficult. In a world of more than 8 billion, no two human beings are alike. Not even identical twins raised in a single household. Talking to someone, anyone – even to a partner, child or parent – involves contending with differences. Such gaps are expectedly exacerbated in professional and institutional settings. But she draws us into her work with enticing promises: That “adult development theory” can help leaders develop an almost see-through vision into employee motivations and behavior and accord coaches with a superpower. And can inject everyone with greater self-awareness by cultivating what she calls “complexity fitness”.
Berger offers the example of Eleonore, a graduate of Harvard Law School, who was thrilled as any twenty-something might be, to land a job at a pedigreed law firm. She was kicked about “mak[ing] her family proud – and her college friends a little jealous.” Eight years later, with a toddler in tow, her perspective had changed. “She craved more time to do the things she wanted, more time to choose her own path, less time jumping at the whims of others.” Her initial goals were centered around how she might be perceived by others. Over time, the focus shifted to gaining autonomy and personal time. If Eleonore hadn’t grown developmentally, Jennifer observes, she might still be obsessing 8 years later, with how she’s perceived by colleagues at the firm, by other stay-at-home Moms and by her own mother.
Trickier workplace situations can test our capacities to navigate contradictions, paradoxes and grey zones. Often, in such cases, “correct” responses may not be obvious. Berger presents the instance of a relatively new boss, Monique, who frequently sidelines her manager and directly interacts with her reportees. The manager hears that one of her subordinates, Jonathan, has fixed a meeting with Monique. This can set her mind whirring in various ways. Possible responses to this situation could vary according to leader types:
- The Self-Sovereign Leader: She is infuriated and then anxious. Does Jonathan intend to squeal about her small (but forbidden) external consulting assignment? To counter that, can she remind him of the manner in which he sneaked away to a daughter’s soccer game?
- The Socialized Leader: She shared a certain chemistry with her earlier boss and now she’s paralyzed by uncertainty. Is Monique trying to say something?
- The Self-Authored Leader: She’s curious about Monique’s management style. But she plans to communicate her unease with the situation, and the manner in which it’s injecting politics into the place. Maybe, if she gets where Monique’s coming from, she can find a style that suits both.
In general, the Self-Authored Leader has a broader, big-picture perspective, but is also confident about her own standing. The Self-Sovereign Leader is me-centered and oblivious to the viewpoints of other stakeholders. The Socialized leader is other-centered, takes succor from families and organization, but has no authority vested in the self. While 40% of adults, according to studies, tend to be Self-Authored, there can be one more Leader type to aspire to – the Self-Transforming Leader.
The Self-Transforming Leader
- Is attuned to various stakeholders around them
- Can understand different sides of an issue and think about them all at the same time, even if they are very different.
- Can spot not just differences with other people, but also similarities.
- Sees the world in shades of grey, rather than in strident blacks and whites.
- Is “less ideological, less easy to pin down about a particular opinion or idea.”
- In short, people with a self-transforming mind are less tied to their own opinions, “even their own identities.”
Rakesh, who has a self-transforming mind, will approach the Monique situation with curiosity. He sees pros and cons with what she’s doing. Nonetheless, he notes that it can cause confusion. So he plans to discuss it with Monique, especially to clarify structures for his subordinates. But he’s open-minded and not attached to any particular outcome from the meeting.
Berger’s own life, embedded in an intentional community in France, is a living testimony to her prescriptions in this book. After founding “Cultivating Leadership”, a firm based on the principles in Changing on the Job, she decided to live with a community of 13 people, who work together. Since then the organization has also grown to about 100 people, with many clients. Their profits are invested into a foundation they’ve created, in order to amplify their impact. They do all this without striving to win a frenzied race to nowhere: “We do not practice development as an end in itself. Development is not a race to the finish line. There’s no prize for being the first in your high school class to become self-authored or the most self-transforming on your deathbed.”
References
Jennifer Garvey Berger, Changing on the Job: How Leaders Become Courageous, Wise and Steady in an Anxious World, Second Edition, Stanford Business Books, Stanford University Press, 2025